Thursday, August 11, 2011

Dumpster Diving

I love teenagers. Seriously.

An awesome young woman that I admire said to me, "Hey, did your son tell you we were thinking about going out later tonight?"

"Uh, no. Where--" but then I stopped myself, realizing I was prying, and instead said, "I'm sure you guys would have a blast."

Her eyebrows popped up. "Really? You don't mind if a bunch of us go out later?"

I denied my inner control freak and mounting curiosity. "No. I don't mind. He's old enough to make his own decisions."

"Oh. Cool!!"

So, I arrived home and said to my seventeen-year-old son, "So, I talked to Bertha (name changed to protect the innocent instigator), and she said you guys are going out tonight."

His eyebrows popped up. "Really? You don't mind?"

My curiosity became harder to control. "No. As long as you walk in the door before midnight. I don't care if you go have fun with your friends." I'm such a great mom.

"Well, I don't know if we can be home before midnight, because Krispy Kreme doesn't close until 11pm, and it takes half an hour just to drive back home after that, and we'll need time to go through the dumpster."

"WHAT?!" I very calmly asked.

"Dumpster diving," he very calmly replied. "You said you didn't mind."

"WHAT?!" I heard myself repeat.

"Dumpster diving. Krispy Kreme closes at 11pm. They throw out their unsold donuts. We grab them from the dumpster and run."

Clearly my son is too young to make his own decisions.

"I'm sure that can't be legal," I said.

"The girls have done it before." He smiled and waggled his big bushy eyebrows.

"That doesn't make it legal. And, I'm not getting you out of jail. You will have to sit there and rot."

"Okay! Thanks, Mom!" And he dialed his friends to make plans.

p.s. If dumpster diving is illegal, please consider this a completely fictional story. I am, after all, a writer.


  1. LOL. Kids are hilarious. How would we get through the otherwise mundane week without them?

  2. Oh yuck. Why not just pay for a nice warm fresh donut.

  3. That is disgusting! You couldn't pay me enough to do that.

  4. I totally agree with the above comments! YUCK! They said they opened one bag and were completely grossed out by what they found, but they found several bags of fresh donuts. Hundreds of donuts (divided amongst 12 teenagers). Still. YUCK! When I went out to my car this morning, there was icing and crumbs all over the seats and carpets. The steering wheel was sticky and the gear shift was sticky. YUCK. So, needless to say, they cleaned my car. It's very clean now. And, they've been eating donuts all day. Even shared some with the neighbors.

  5. This post had me cracking up! I'm not sure I'd be too keen on eating dumpster donuts, though. Maybe if they were near the top...and in bags. Lol!

  6. Great story. As if day-old doughnuts from a garbage can aren't the coolest things in the world. :)

  7. Okay okay, but you would be surprised at what people find at the right dumpster. I don't want to give anyone any ideas, so I'll say no more.

  8. Dumpster diving can be very profitable. Have you ever watched Antiques Roadshow?

  9. Nice Post Material for recycling may be collected separately from general waste using dedicated bins and collection vehicles, or sorted directly from mixed waste streams.

  10. Nice story.I like your story.keep it up sharing such a nice things.

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  12. i've done that before. Our citys crispy kreme keeps their dumpster door open and clean just for us to take them! I love dumpster doughnuts!!!

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