Monday, February 20, 2012

Campaign Challenge: ALONE


Today starts a fun campaign challenge. CLICK HERE for all of the details.

Basic details: "Write a flash fiction story in 200 words or less. Begin the story with the words, “Shadows crept across the wall”. These five words will be included in the word count. If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), do one or more of these:
• end the story with the words: "everything faded." (also included in the word count)
• include the word "orange" in the story
• write in the same genre you normally write
• make your story 200 words exactly!"

I tackled all of the items on the list. :) Here's my entry:


ALONE
by
Margo Kelly

 Shadows crept across the wall. I froze in bed listening for the sound to come again, but only the antique clock on my mother’s dresser ticked as I refused to breathe. What had woken me? The heater? A passing car? What was I thinking when I convinced my parents to let me stay by myself for the night? I’m seventeen. I should be fine. I took a deep breath and fluffed my pillow—the silky orange fabric seemed black in the darkened room. But before I threw my head back down on the pillow, more shadows crawled along the wall, and a moan from outside the bedroom window made every hair on my skin stand. A lump grew in my throat, cut off my air. I grabbed the cordless phone, and my finger hovered, ready to dial 911. But I hesitated. Maybe my imagination tricked me. I tiptoed to the window and pulled the drapes away from the edge of the frame. Flashlights danced across the yard. I leaned closer. White balls cascaded through the trees leaving long trails behind. A smile snuck across my face. Friends were toilet papering the yard. I let the drapes close and everything faded.

52 comments:

  1. Ooh that was interesting! I like how she's really scared at first; I could really feel what she was feeling. Great job!

    I'm entry #19

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  2. Nice humorous twist to your story, Margo! I enjoyed your flash fiction a lot.

    I've tagged you over at http://writegame.blogspot.com, so come over and play if you're in the mood.

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  3. Cute! Way to turn the story in an unexpected way :D Verrrry fun, Margo ;)

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  4. Nothing speaks real friendship like free toilet paper.

    Nice one, Margo! :)

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  5. Hee hee. Great ending. You took scary and turned into happy. Nice!

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  6. Great piece! I love the mood-setting and the fun resolution. TP'ing a yard-- LOL.

    Well done.

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  7. I really enjoyed this. It could happen very easily.

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  8. What a cute twist! Great writing, I liked this one. :)

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  9. This story was fun rather than terror-filled like some of the others. Good work!

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  10. I was getting ready to be super scared! Thanks for not giving me nightmares! I know EXACTLY what that feeling is like: you suddenly hear something and FREEZE in your bed. Not moving, not breathing, waiting for the sound to come again... Hard to get to sleep after that!

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  11. Love the twist to a funny ending. Great scene.

    New follower

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  12. thanks for a happy ending! the closing prompt leads us to darker ends...
    nice work!

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  13. Hah! Oh, I really liked this one. Great work, Margo! :)

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  14. Haha - so chilling at first, then such a clever end. But man, I was feeling everything. Great job!

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  15. Loved the suspenseful build-up, and then the twist ending - great job! :)

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  16. Hey there! New campaigner finally making the rounds.

    I was amused by your writing. You really did well at setting a creepy tone so that the twist is delicious. Nice work.

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  17. Nice way to defuse the tension at the end. We breathe a sigh of relief along with the protagonist. Nicely done!

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  18. Heh heh.. great job building the suspense. Love the twist.

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  19. Great twist to the story! Very unexpected!! :) Nice job!

    I'm #37

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  20. Very nice set up. You really managed to get the tone down.

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  21. Whew! Just a prank. I had fun reading this. It made me think of the nights I spent alone when I was a kid. Everything really does seem a million times louder. :)

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  22. You really captured the unease of a teen alone at night. Love the humorous ending! :)

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  23. haha. I did not expect that ending! BUT, I totally don't like being hope alone at night. I even live on the third level of an apartment building and still freak out about people being outside the window.

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  24. Scary beginning...could have gone anywhere but your twist stumped me. Great Job.

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  25. Oh, that's alright then! :) Humorous twist, at least he's not alone and can stop worrying about unwelcome intruders!

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  26. Great post. The beginning part had great suspense.

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  27. I love being home alone. It's so peaceful -- but I liked your story a lot. What a pity there wasn't a little more room to elaborate on the ending. It came a bit suddenly.

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  28. I was getting all prepared to be scared and you tricked me. Enjoyed reading this very much.

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  29. Nice set up and surprise ending. Mine is # 71

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  30. Very humorous! I took a similar route with this story :)
    #83

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  31. Waking up alone in the middle of the night brings strong visuals. Great ending :)

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  32. Great build up to a refreshing ending. ;) Nicely done.

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  33. Very nice. I love the twist. I remember those first days of staying alone in the house...

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  34. Good ending to an almost scary story. Liked the funny twist.

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  35. Intense with a great letdown! Truly different. I like it! I'm entry #96

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  36. That's a great ending! I was so worried for her.

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  37. I love it! I was expecting an intruder or something bad to happen! What a fun surprise=)

    By the say, I've nominated you for the Sunshine Award=)

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  38. I love the twist and the humor. Great idea. The mixture of fear and laughter was fun.

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  39. Oh I am SO glad that ended with a :) Good Job!!
    Stop by..I tagged you.

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  40. TPing her yard? I always wanted to fork one, but I think I'm a bit too old for that now ^_^

    #109

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  41. Cute! You had me all worried something else was going on :) Great job!

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  42. You've been tagged! http://iwriteandread.blogspot.com/2012/02/wip-wednesday-week-3-and-tag-youre-it.html

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  43. I like the surprise ending. Great job!

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  44. The beginning of the story hinted at something more sinister at play, and I'm relieved for the protagonist that it was only her friends playing a prank on her. Good stuff!

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  45. Whew! That was a close one. Good job!
    #160

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  46. What did she do to make her friends throw toilet paper into her trees and throughout her yard? Brings together great imagery!

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  47. I was holding my breath too! Good job:)

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  48. I like this, and what a pleasant change to have an unexpectedly happy ending :-)

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